Life goes on......................

12^th of Oct, 1999 – It was the holidays after the term exams. Myself and my friend were standing on that street corner. He was pushing me and shouting “Po daaa. Sollu po. Naan inga wait panren”. I shoved his hand away and kept glued to the place we were standing. “Bayamaa irukku da” I replied. The conversation went on until he finally managed to convince me to go ahead. I started towards the yellow painted house. I was just hoping that the walk will never end. The sun was beating down mercilessly which added to the heat of the moment. Atlast I reached the gate, I was still hoping that probably a locked door will save me. But no, it was wide open and there she came in a round neck t-shirt and a skirt, the symbol of most studious people – a spectacled nose. We chose to sit on the stair case leading to the terrace

“Enna indha timela” she queried as she closed the notebook which she was carrying. I did not know what to answer. I knew for sure that she will not buy if am going to give some crap reason as ‘doubt in one chapter in Business maths’ I was trying hard to comeup with some story when she, realizing my helplessness immediately changed the topic. “Are you not joining us for the tour tomorrow” I asked (I knew already that the list of members going to Ooty the next day was already finalized and she is not making it). “No yaar, parents are not allowing, moreover its proving to be costly. So you guys enjoy” she said. “But this is the last year of schooling and after this all of us will be scattered, why don’t you give it a final try” I suggested. The conversation continued for a while and after that I suddenly remembered the purpose of me making it to her place and the plight of my dear friend who was waiting patiently at the corner of the street. So I got up signaling that I would like to leave. Her expression evidently read “Why did this guy walk in middle of a scorching day and after a few minutes why does he take leave without saying anything”. Probably If she had had even the slightest idea of what I was about to say she would not have been that eager to hear it from my mouth.

As I turned towards the gate and stepped out, I realized that I cant carry it with me anymore and If were to return without telling her, I will be bashed up by my friends, whom I had been troubling a lot because of this issue. So I turned back. She was still there, probably realizing that I wanted her to stay back for a little while. As I looked into her eyes, I could sense my throat turning hoarse. The words refused to come out. “Nothing….. actually what am trying to say is” I started….. “Since I wont be here for the next week on occasion of the tour and as days pass by I find it difficult to carry along this feeling in me…….” and then I SAID IT.............

Yes!!!!!!! I finally managed to sum up the guts to propose to her. What a relief it was !!!! I had been carrying it with me for almost a year and finally it came out. Of course, as with most cases, she immediately said a NO, gave parents as the reason and finally after negotiation she said she needed time. Feeling satisfied to have closed on a good deal I gleefully walked back towards my friend who was still waiting there in the corner.

The tour was over, so was the holidays. School resumed and still the signal was in Amber for me. Days went by and my hopes started to diminish and it started to tell on my otherwise very cheerful behavior in school. Sympathies started pouring in on my favour and for her, people took turns to give her a piece of advice on what they thought about the situation. No change yet.

4^th Nov, 1999 – It was my friends birthday. Yes, the same poor fellow who was waiting at the street corner that day. The whole class was celebrating it and I was joining them unaware of the greater celebration which was about to follow. Yes...... By the day end, atlast the signal showed GREEN. My joy knew no bounds. I was too happy and too busy rejoicing that I was not bothered to realize the magnitude and seriousness of the commitment which I was getting into. Years rolled by and what started off as an infatuation gradually grew into a long term relationship, inching towards the tying of knot....... It was a great feeling to live my dream, the dream of being together forever.

31^st July 2008 – Its her birthday today. Earlier, I had sent her a SMS wishes at midnight 12:00 not wanting to disturb her housefolks and then dozed off. As always for a 9:30 office I woke up at sharp 9:00. Not bothering for a bath, immediately I got dressed up, sprayed the best of perfume available and started to office. Upon logging onto my inbox, there I saw....... Her e-mail...... I opened and downloaded the JPEG attachment simultaneously as I was getting onto the content of the mail.

The mail read "Coming down to Chennai next month for my husband's relative's marriage" As I finished reading the full mail, the photo popped up displaying 'A lady carrying a cute little girl baby'. It was her photo with her new-born kid.

With a wry smile I closed the photo and carried on with the office work. Life moves on and so do I, but holding onto dear memories………

regards

J. Sri Kumar